Contested Marriage

Marriage: Peace/Animosity

October 16, 2022 / Josh Sercey

This week Pastor Josh explores how to make peace in a marriage (James 3:13-4:3). We see together what drives animosity and how to make peace.

  • Being at peace in a relationship is more than just being free of conflict. We have to also discover what leads to conflict.
  • What leads to our conflict is when our desires go unsatisfied, and we choose to take it out on one another. 
  • Instead, we should listen to our desires rather than have them control us. We can do this when we stop competing with someone else’s desires.


  1. What is your experience of conflict in a relationship? How in the past have you sought to make peace? 
  2. The Apostle James commends to us a wisdom in relationships that is not selfish or self-concerned. How have you experienced a relationship where the other person was only concerned with themself? How did that create trouble in the relationship? 
  3. Instead of being self-concerned, we should give space for each other’s desire to be expressed. We can express our desires without having them compete with one another. Is there a relationship in your life right now that needs this most? How can you express your desires without them becoming a demand? 
  4. Even when our desires go unmet with each other, we can know our deepest desires are met by God. He can be the satisfaction we don’t find in one another. Where are you experiencing this right now? How is your relationship with God bringing contentment or satisfaction?